'It's All in the Surrender': Reflection and Thanks from Archbishop Aquila
- Archbishop Samuel J. Aquila
- Mar 2
- 6 min read
My dear brothers and sisters in Christ,
In this farewell letter to you, I want to share some of the gifts I have received as a priest, bishop, and disciple of Jesus, in serving him and the faithful he has brought into my life throughout the years. The gifts are far too many, undeserved and not earned. They fill my heart with wonder and gratitude to the Father, Jesus and the Holy Spirit, and to Mary as my mother, as I call them to mind.
I am writing this letter on the memorial of Our Lady of Lourdes, and I am taken back to my first trip to Lourdes with my family in 1964. We were visiting family in Sicily, and then took time to tour northern Italy, Switzerland and France. While at Lourdes, I remember how profoundly I was struck by the procession of the sick.
The profound faith of those headed to the grotto and to the baths deeply touched my heart. Their faith was palpable and real, reminding me of my grandmother’s. When I was a child, I would watch her pray so fervently, at times with tears running down her cheeks. Faith in Jesus and in Mary leading me to Jesus always stuck with me, even in those times when I was far from the Lord. Faith is a gift that the Lord invited me to receive as a child and young person, and it began my journey to where I am today.
God's Mercy is Everything
When I was in the seminary, one of my apostolates was at Lutheran Hospital, and I remember speaking with and listening to a woman who, decades ago, had had an abortion. She believed that God would never forgive her. I told her that I couldn’t hear her Confession (I was still a seminarian, after all) but would make sure a priest would come to see her. I assured her God would forgive her.
A few weeks later, I received a letter from her telling me she had gone to Confession. She felt free from shame and guilt. She thanked me profoundly and shared that her confidence in the Father’s mercy grew because of me. While her letter affirmed me in the call to the priesthood, it also taught me that the love, mercy and forgiveness of the Father are pure gifts when we open our hearts to him and repent of our sin.
Furthermore, as I have reflected on it over the years, it taught me that God is faithful to his promises, “though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red like crimson, they shall become like wool” (Isaiah 1:18b). “So great is his steadfast love … as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us” (Psalm 103:11b-12). The Father’s gift of mercy waits for every sinner, when they turn away from their sin and repent. When I hear Confessions, I am to be merciful and lead people to Jesus’ mercy, never condoning or excusing their sin, but affirming mercy and God’s forgiveness of their sin, no matter how great.
It's All in the Surrender
Once I was ordained a priest in 1976, I began attending 8-day silent directed Ignatian retreats. In seminary, I found that silence helped me in my prayer and in growing in intimacy with each person of the Trinity. In 2004, as a bishop, I was able to make a 30-day silent retreat. I had been a priest for 28 years at the time, including three years as a bishop in Fargo, North Dakota. During the first week of the retreat, I learned from God the profound gift of surrender. There had been snippets of surrender in my early priesthood: dying to myself and living for God and others. The surrender of Jesus in his Passion and in the Eucharist always struck me as an invitation.
During that first week of retreat, I went to get an ice cream cone, and I overheard a young couple in front of me talking about Eucharistic Adoration. My curiosity was piqued, so I quietly eavesdropped. The conversation was intense, and the young man spoke with equal intensity as we headed down the street, me a few steps behind, listening. At a certain point, they stopped, and I stopped, looking at the building across the street; I was fully attuned to their conversation at this point. He began to speak about the real presence of Jesus and how he and his three friends would drive in silence to prepare for their encounter with Jesus when going to Adoration. She looked very puzzled and asked him why. He responded, “Don’t you see? It is all in the surrender. Our surrender to Jesus.”
“It is all in the surrender” became the theme of that 30-day retreat. It was a pure gift given by Providential love at that moment, and the gift remains with me. As I prayed with it, I saw how my episcopal motto, from the last words of Mary spoken in John’s Gospel, “Do whatever he tells you” (John 2:5), is a part of that surrender. Though I was not consciously aware of the surrender in it when I chose the motto several years earlier, the Lord brought it to light. Several years later, I would become aware of the Surrender Novena, and have prayed it regularly since, restarting it every nine days.
Gratitude
This brings me to the last gift I want to mention, though there are many others: gratitude for the past almost 50 years of priesthood and 25 years of serving as a bishop. A gratitude that runs deep and overflows with the love of the Trinity.
Never in my imagination did I think I would receive so many innumerable gifts throughout my years of ministry.
The Lord blessed me with so many people to serve as a parochial vicar and pastor. He blessed me during graduate studies in Rome, and in my closeness to Pope St. John Paul II, both there and during World Youth Day 1993, which brought innumerable blessings to the Archdiocese of Denver, including the founding of two new seminaries, at one of which I served as founding rector.
The Lord blessed me again by calling me to become bishop of a rural diocese, knowing nothing of rural life. I fell in love with the love of Jesus for the clergy and laity of the Diocese of Fargo, where I served 11 years. It was a tremendous blessing to help the people of Fargo to encounter Jesus, grow in love of the sacraments, and be on mission.
And then, in July 2012, he blessed me again by calling me to return to my home diocese as Archbishop. These past 13+ years have been a wondrous gift from the Father! Even in the challenges experienced during that time. I am grateful to the clergy, religious and laity for what we have worked through together, most especially as we have moved from maintenance to mission, putting Jesus and prayer first in our lives, and seeing the growth in our parishes with many new to the faith and others returning, like the Prodigal Son. I am grateful for the amazing blossoming of vocations to the priesthood. I am grateful for those who serve at the Curia, parishes and ministries, that many of us have come to discover that it is God’s plan, not ours, that we are called to be about. We have learned to re-engage our lives with a biblical worldview and put Jesus first in our lives.
My beloved flock, know that I will always carry you in my heart and prayer in this time of retirement. I ask you to join me in lifting our hearts in gratitude to the Trinity for all that the Lord has accomplished through our surrender to him over these years that I served, and for the growth of our faith in him. Jesus is faithful to his promises in John 15 that when we stay attached to him, the Vine, and abide in him, we will bear much fruit! It is his fruit that is borne through us and provides us with his joy.
Now I ask that you welcome with heartfelt joy, as I have, our new shepherd, Archbishop-designate Golka, who will continue to guide you with the heart of the Good Shepherd. With St. Paul, “I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ” (Philippians 1:6).
Praised be Jesus Christ, now and forever!
