4 Ways Pope Francis Helped Shape My Motherhood

Pope Francis is hugged by a young visitor at his general audience at the Vatican, Wednesday, Feb. 12, 2025. (Photo: Vatican Media)

I was studying abroad at Franciscan University when Pope St. John Paul II died. I was privileged to go to Rome with my class to pray briefly before his body as it lay in state in St. Peter’s. A few weeks later, I attended Pope Benedict’s installation Mass.

I grew up under JPII and as an adult under Pope Benedict XVI, but I grew in motherhood under Pope Francis’ pontificate.

My oldest was one, and my second was a newborn when the new pope was announced. I was just coming out of a deep postpartum depression, and I remember turning on the TV in the basement and waiting for hours for him to walk out on the balcony. I missed the moment when Pope Francis actually appeared for the first time, but that is a different story. As I reflect on the last decade-plus of raising my children under the pontificate of Pope Francis, four moments stick out.

The Call to Love

I was writing for CatholicMarriagePrep.com when Amoris Laetitia was published. I had only been married for 5 years and had just become pregnant with our fourth child when I read it and realized I still had a great deal to learn about love. While I was seemingly drowning with babies, the Pope wrote, “The couple that loves and begets life is a true, living icon. . . capable of revealing God the Creator and Savior” (AL 11). This declaration of the holiness of family life encouraged me at a moment when I needed it most.

Later in the document, Pope Francis reminded readers that love is more than a feeling. He wrote that the grace of the sacrament perfects a couple’s love and allows us to “experience the happiness of giving” (AL 94). Reading that prompted some thoughtful reflections on how to give more to my husband and children while complaining less. I came up with practical ideas to serve my husband in love, which has left lasting benefits.

The Year of Mercy

The Jubilee Year of Mercy concluded just months before my fourth child was born. During that pregnancy, I was set on a journey of healing and mercy, as recounted in my book, Baby and Beyond: Overcoming Those Post-Childbirth Woes. Since mercy was the subject of so many reflections that year, the message really began to take root.

After years of berating myself for not cutting it as a good mother, after years of feeling like Confession was a chore instead of a gift, I began to have a new experience of conversion. Over the next few years, I truly encountered the Father’s love through Jesus during prayer, Confession and spiritual direction. This experience of mercy changed everything, ultimately helping me to become a better mother.

Ubi et Orbi Blessing

The year was 2020, and the world was shut down due to COVID-19. Late in March, I tuned in with millions around the globe to see Pope Francis in an eerily empty St. Peter’s Square. The weather was rainy, matching the somber mood of the world, and Pope Francis walked with a limp. He held Eucharistic Adoration, prayed before a crucifix and venerated an image of Mary. Pope Francis exhorted us not to be afraid, to embrace the cross, which gives us hope, and entrusted everyone to Our Lady. I can still hear the bells ringing while, a world away, Pope Francis blessed us all with the blessing of Christ in the monstrance.

As a mother, I was grateful to have already been homeschooling by then. But the mental fatigue of deciding when to go out, how to navigate relationships and how to keep my family safe, all while desiring to go back to church, weighed on me. That day, I was struck by how the pope united in hope all the world's suffering and represented the Church and her mission to bring Christ to all people. His reflection on the Gospel of the disciples in the boat helped me to hope and trust in the power of God to bring good out of difficult situations.

Year of Hope

That same message of hope reverberates in my being five years later in the new Jubilee Year of Hope. In the papal bull declaring the new jubilee year, Pope Francis wrote, “In the heart of each person, hope dwells as the desire and expectation of good things to come, despite our not knowing what the future may bring” (Spes non confundit 1).

We live in a world full of wars and natural disasters, as we have watched towns become decimated by floods or fires. We live in an era of serious political divide, a lack of authentic relationships and tech overrun by AI. And amid all of this, I am trying to raise five kids in a culture that does not value children or our faith. There are many reasons to feel anxiety about the future.

And yet, Pope Francis goes on to say, “The Holy Spirit illumines all believers with the light of hope. He keeps that light burning, like an ever-burning lamp, to sustain and invigorate our lives. Christian hope does not deceive or disappoint because it is grounded in the certainty that nothing and no one may ever separate us from God’s love” (SNC 3).

I love the image of a burning lamp, like a lighthouse, sustaining our hope amid tempests and storms.

The richness of these jubilee years’ graces becomes more apparent as I reflect on them and how they have shaped my motherhood. Now, in my prayer, the longing for my eternal home strengthens as I journey deeper into the love of the Trinity.

Now, as we mourn Pope Francis’ passing, I’m grateful for his encouragement in my motherhood, and I pray that he has received the embrace of the Father’s merciful arms, in which he placed his hope.